Words: Rose Macdonald-Buchanan
You have searched your soul, tried to be apart for some time, and sadly you know that things just won’t get better than they were before. Alternatively, you’ve done wrong and you know it. Sleeping with her best friend after you had an argument last week is shameful. Or maybe you forgot to go to her sister’s wedding that she invited you to six months ago. She screamed at you over the phone and damaged the sound, threw water in your face, and told you to f*** off.
Women aren’t called drama queens for no reason, and when it’s deserved aggression, we are even better at being bitchy. Your heart sinks when you think about the girl you genuinely loved moving away, and maybe, moving on. Devastated, you need to win her back, and this task could take much longer than you had imagined. She’s no fool.
It is possible to rekindle a romance with your ex but the truth is that mediocre moves just won’t do. Re-engage with caution gents, this is not an easy ride.
Vulnerability
It can work but I don’t want to encourage it as the first option. Texting her saying you want her back, ringing her or even telling her in person is only ‘nice,’ and nice is not good enough. You need to get on your knees and tell her personally that you want her more than you ever have done and need her back in your life. She may not buy it. An easy act, transparent, and we have heard that one before. So, if you mean it, prove it.
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She would rather you made the effort
Take the tube through London, arrive at her door, bang it down, in the rain. It sounds like an iconic scene from a romantic film, but seriously, it will mean the world to her.
Apologise (properly, with meaning)
For god’s sake, just put your hands up and surrender when you know you have done wrong. Men that beat around the bush with sloppy answers and excuses are tedious and immature. Admit when you have done wrong, she will admire your honesty, and at least she may realise she can trust you just a little bit more than before…
Make a grand gesture
This is a real show stopper. Spoil her, embarrass her with your kindness and generosity but do not take things too far. Just because you want her back does not mean you propose.
Space
Vital for recovery and reconciliation. Harassing her whilst her heart is bleeding will only make the wounds deeper. Apologise; you still love her, give her time and space and then talking and moving on will be much more simple for both of you.
So, did you learn your lesson?
We hope so. Tell her what you did wrong or right, why you did it, how you hope to change and you may just be on the road to a fresh start.
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