Words: James Somper
Deal day: the zenith of your business career.
You haven’t slept properly for six months and you’ve been surviving off a diet of Kit Kats, ham sandwiches and endless cans of Red Bull. The friendly odour of nicotine clings to you. You can’t quite remember what your girlfriend looks like and the company lawyers are your new best friends, but all too soon, the big day arrives. You’ve got the suit, the swag and the adrenalin to boot but there’s one potential deal breaker left to be beaten; the handshake.
If you’ve got this far, the last thing you want to do is ruin the deal by collapsing to your knees with exhaustion or, worst of all offering up a limp hand. Heck, who knows, those signatures could be ripped up in a matter of minutes.
Clean and mean, You look immaculate. Swept back hair and the best suit you’ve ever worn in your life. Why ruin it with sweaty palms? Keep a soft cotton handkerchief to hand and in pocket to beat the nervous sweats.
Be the first to extend your hand, This is your deal. You’ve worked for it and have been blabbing on to your friends for the last six months about just how much cash you’re going to make and the inevitable stream of watches and cars that will follow. You own this thing: it’s your baby. This means it’s your hand first.
Firm but friendly, So far you’ve done just about everything right. Don’t throw it all away by ripping his arm off. A firm, solid, yet not overly powerful handshake will seal the deal. There’s no need to overdo it, this isn’t Fist of Fury.
It’s all in the eyes, It’s his hand in yours. He’s signed that piece of paper; it’s all done now. But, there’s one more trial, one more tribal ritual to go through before it’s all over and you can finally walk into that Ferrari garage: you must look him in the eye. This is the final moment; that brief, cursory glance where you look in to the depths of each other’s souls. You’ll assess him and he’ll assess you. Remember: too long and you’ll seem more psychotic than Hannibal Lecter, too brief and that Ferrari could vanish in smoke (not literally of course).
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