Words: Vincent Lim
Whether host or guest, there’s plenty of room for slipping up at a dinner party. It’s not just about the food or the company, there are so many different nuances that need to be obeyed and traversed in this most sacred of gentlemanly engagements.
Play the perfect host
1. Invite the right people
This will make life so much easier for you and your guests if done correctly. Don’t invite too many, and be selective with who you pick. Avoiding any controversial figures will make it far easier to maintain an air of sophistication and stop your evening from descending into a ruckus; similarly, pick too many introverts and awkward silences will abound.
2. Be sensible with food
No matter what your aspirations are, we’re sorry to inform you that you’re not a Michelin starred chef (unless you actually are, in which case ignore this part). Don’t cook too much as you won’t be able to handle it and your guests certainly won’t either. Ensure there’s plenty of food, and time cooking well to stop the gaps between courses seeming like theatrical intervals. Cook something tried and tested, as your guests will not want to be eating a failed experiment.
3. Wine, don’t whine.
Offering a drink upon arrival is imperative; go for something fizzy to kick the evening off in style. During the meal, offer both red and white, as your primary concern will be your guests’ welfare. It would be ungentlemanly to lambast the lady on your left for pairing a Chardonnay with your perfectly braised venison, even though we all know you’d be in the right.
Be the perfect guest
4. Reply
Always reply to an invitation, even if you don’t want to go. Politely declining is infinitely better than leaving the poor host to rethink their entire table plan and meal timings. Don’t tarnish your hard earned reputation by pulling out at the last minute – that hangover is no excuse.
5. Don’t be late
Of course you’re not expect to arrive right on the dot, but arriving late with the meal getting cold would just be selfish. Conversely, don’t arrive early either; your host won’t want to be dealing with you when they’re busy preparing for the evening.
6. Bring a gift
You don’t need to go all out and wrap something up, but don’t turn up empty-handed. A bottle of wine or some flowers will do just fine; leaving the label on would be a disaster.
7. Acknowledge the food
Despite how good the food actually is, let your host know that you’re enjoying it. It’ll go a long way, especially when the chef has been slaving away for hours on end.
8. Offer a hand
There’s usually no such thing as a free meal, so don’t expect to be treated like you’re at a restaurant. Offer a helping hand with clearing plates, pouring wine, making coffee, etc.
9. Know when to leave
If everyone’s already left and you’re still merrily sipping on your whisky, with the host yawning, looking at their watch and their replies getting shorter, you know it’s time to leave. See it off and let the poor chap get some sleep.
10. Reciprocate
Had a good evening as a guest? Your turn to play host.
Become a Gentleman’s Journal Member?
Like the Gentleman’s Journal? Why not join the Clubhouse, a special kind of private club where members receive offers and experiences from hand-picked, premium brands. You will also receive invites to exclusive events, the quarterly print magazine delivered directly to your door and your own membership card.
